March 12

Di--

I'm so stupid! I'm crying in rage. No, this does not concern Eli. (Gasp!)

We took four big tests today. One was in math. Lately, I haven't felt very confident in my mathematical abilities. Well, my low self-esteem just reached rock bottom. I had trouble in a subtraction problem getting the answer and lower number to equal the highest number. I remembered the no's. and wanted to check them out on the calculator with the faint hope [that] I got the problem right. I can't contain myself anymore...

Great. I just burst into tears again. You probably think I'm making a big deal out of nothing. BUT I USED TO ACE MY TESTS. I GOT 100 %. A plus. And now look at me. I'm a wreck. I can't do anything right. I probably missed a million others.

I'm stupid. I'm just as dumb as everyone else. Hear me, you crazy, idiotic Diary??

I belong in all the dumb classes. I can't be a writer... probably, but no one had the guts to extinguish my dreams. I'm nothing. Nobody. I might as well be dead.

Stupid & Dumb,
Vanessa